Helen—Yes, intense, busy children may be more at risk for encopresis.  They just won’t take the time to sit, relax, and go.  The relaxation actually is very important for the voiding reflex, intense emotional engagement tends to slow the GI tract and your 9 y/o son can succeed in holding and fighting off his urges which can lead to an enlarged colon.  So, he has a well trained, over learned holding reflex which is gaining on and replacing his voiding reflex.  Accidents will occur and they are just that, oops!  The secretiveness is bad news.  It is avoidance, denial, and it only buries the problem deeper and deeper.  He will be harder to treat and resistant to facing the truth.  I am afraid a few “tips” are not going to take care of this.  You could go to the open public forum (email addresses protected) at www.encopresis.org  for all kinds of tips.  Maybe you will luck out.  Unfortunately, my experience of these forums is that they only result in a lot of helter-skelter applications that really don’t solve the basic issues and they only delay using an effective, well organized treatment protocol.  You were wise to do your research and look for my manual, the Clean Kid Manual, which can only be purchased from www.soilingsolutions.com.  If you purchase it you will gain access to other parents on an exclusive email forum who have been very successful and are using the manual.  Some like to stay on and help the “newbies.”  The parents are all in it together, have the manual in common, and share tremendous insights and support.